Zahraa
I’ve never been good with money but it all came to a head when I split up with my husband. I felt so guilty about the effect it would have on the kids that I spent six times more on Christmas than usual. I then had to go to part time at work but the bills were still the same.
I was constantly struggling. I would pay whoever was frightening me the most. I was frightened every time the phone rang and every time someone knocked at the door. I used to long for Sundays because it was the only day the post didn’t come. I was so ashamed and felt so stupid, at my age I should know better than to be in this mess. I was fighting a losing battle and I was drowning. It affected my relationships with my children as I was constantly bad tempered. I was depressed and suicidal; if it hadn’t been for my children I honestly think I would have taken that way out.
Just when I couldn’t cope anymore I heard about CAP through another parent at school. I was a little apprehensive about whether they would help me because I’m a Muslim, but when Stephen (CAP counsellor) came I felt so comfortable and never felt judged. I just cried with relief when he left.
Stephen organised a budget for me and talked to the people I owed money to. I’ve now done a year of the budget and got four years to go until I’m debt free. The CAP Account is brilliant, I pay what I need for my bills and debts and everything I’ve got left is mine for food and essentials and I’ve got savings.
I have a life now, it sounds melodramatic but it’s not. People say I have changed and that I’m not always stressed anymore, which is true. I’m happy and content again now, which 12 months ago I never thought would be possible again. CAP has changed my perception of people. I had got to the point where I thought nobody did anything for nothing, but CAP has changed all that.